Blonde Joke for James

[Laura Ann]

Ok so since your jokes were 'funny' ..... here's another one for you to use.....

I decided that I needed a few days off and I realized that I ran out of vacation time already. I figured the best way to get the Boss to send me home was to act a little crazy. I figured he'd think I was burning out and give me some time off.
I came in to work early the other day and began hanging upside down from the ceiling. Just then one of my coworkers (she's blonde..it'll be important later) came in and asked me what I'm doing.
"Shh," I said, "I'm acting crazy to get a few days off. I'm a light bulb."
A second later the Boss walked by and asked me what I was doing.
"I'm a light bulb!" I exclaimed.
"You're going crazy," he said. "Take a few days off."
With that, I jumped down and started walking out. My coworker started
following me and the Boss asked where she was going.


"I can't work in the dark," she said.


Don't you just love blonde jokes.....!

[CrazyChic69]

That was cute girl:)

[BIG-D]

Ok so since your jokes were 'funny' ..... here's another one for you to use.....

I decided that I needed a few days off and I realized that I ran out of vacation time already. I figured the best way to get the Boss to send me home was to act a little crazy. I figured he'd think I was burning out and give me some time off.
I came in to work early the other day and began hanging upside down from the ceiling. Just then one of my coworkers (she's blonde..it'll be important later) came in and asked me what I'm doing.
"Shh," I said, "I'm acting crazy to get a few days off. I'm a light bulb."
A second later the Boss walked by and asked me what I was doing.
"I'm a light bulb!" I exclaimed.
"You're going crazy," he said. "Take a few days off."
With that, I jumped down and started walking out. My coworker started
following me and the Boss asked where she was going.


"I can't work in the dark," she said.


Don't you just love blonde jokes.....!


let me guess you found $10 dollars too

[Laura Ann]

let me guess you found $10 dollars too

are u talking? :D

[BIG-D]

are u talking? :D

youre damn right im talking ...you best recognize :D

[JenLuvsStunters]

that shyt was funny as hell!!!! i made everyone at work come read that i had like 10 people in my office laughin!!! lol!!

[Laura Ann]

Three blondes were witnesses to a crime, so they went to the police station to identify the suspect. The police chief said he would show them a mug shot of someone for thirty seconds, then ask each one for a description. After showing the photo to the first blonde, he covered it, then asked her how she would recognize the suspect.

''Easy,'' she replied. ''He only has one eye.'' ''He only has one ear,'' was her answer.

''What is the matter with you people?!? It is a profile shot! You are seeing him from the side!'' He repeated the procedure for the third blonde, then said, ''How would you recognize the suspect? Now think before you give me a stupid answer.''

After viewing the photo, she thought for a minute, then said, ''He's wearing contact lenses.''

This took the chief by surprise. He looked real hard at the picture and couldn't tell if the suspect had contacts or not, so he went into the database and looked at the report. Sure enough, when the mug shot was taken, he was wearing contact lenses! He went back to her and asked, ''How could you tell he was wearing contact lenses? Nobody else here in this precinct saw that!''

''Well,'' she said, ''he can't wear regular glasses with only one eye and one ear, now, can he?''

[JenLuvsStunters]

oh wow gurl LMAO where are u gettin these!!!!!!!!!

[CrazyChic69]

You are crackin me up girl :p

[Beatzz]

rofl lolll:D

[Laura Ann]

www.blondejokes101.com or something like that ...... a friend emailed it to me during class.....

[Beatzz]

www.blondejokes101.com or something like that ...... a friend emailed it to me during class.....
bad bad...:p

[BIG-D]

www.blondejokes101.com or something like that ...... a friend emailed it to me during class.....


I shouldve known...you arent that witty to come up with them yourself :p

[JenLuvsStunters]

A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the
freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the
blonde behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was
oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked
down his window, turned on his bullhorn and
yelled, "PULLOVER! "NO," the blonde yelled back,"IT'S A SCARF!"

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A blonde walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the
loan officer. She says she's going to Europe on business for
two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000.
The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security
for the loan, so the blonde hands over the keys to a new Rolls
Royce. The car is parked on the street in front of the bank,
she has the title and everything checks out. The bank agrees to
accept the car as collateral for the loan.
The bank's president and its officers all enjoy a good laugh at
the blonde for using a $250,000 Rolls as collateral against a
$5,000 loan. An employee of the bank then proceeds to drive the
Rolls into the bank's underground garage and parks it there.
Two weeks later, the blonde returns, repays the $5,000 and the
interest,which comes to $15.41. The loan officer says, "Miss,
we are very happy to have had your business, and this
transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little
puzzled.
"While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are
a multimillionaire. What puzzles us is, why would you bother to
borrow $5,000?"
The blond replies....."Where else in New York City can I park
my car for two weeks for only $15.41 and expect it to be there
when I return?"
Finally, a smart blonde joke!

[JenLuvsStunters]

that was rude dennis she made me laugh today!!!! i think its creative!!! so ha!

[JenLuvsStunters]

Theres a blonde and a brunette in a elevator. And a man walks
in with really bad dandruff,so the brunette says "Someone
should give him head and shoulders" and the blonde replys "I
know how to give head but how do you give shoulders?" now thats some funny shyt!!!!!

[BIG-D]

that was rude dennis she made me laugh today!!!! i think its creative!!! so ha!

They made me laugh...Laura knows im just playin with her...I wouldnt be me if i didnt give her shit...didnt talk to her all weekend so I had some catching up to do on the shit givin...Its all good

[JenLuvsStunters]

i know i was just givin u shyt too!!!!

[JenLuvsStunters]

Why are blondes burried in a 't' shaped coffin?

Cause every time you lay them on their back their legs open.
-------------------------------------------
sorry i think these are HILARIOUS!!! exspecially when i'm sittin at my deck with NOTHING too do!!!!!!

[JenLuvsStunters]

A blonde is driving along a free way when she cuts in front of a
truck driver, getting really annoyed the truck driver pulls her
over, and draws a circle and says stand here and don't move
the trucker goes to the blondes car and smashes all the windows,
the blonde starts laughing. "If you think thats funny wait till
you see this!" And he slashes all the tires, and still the
blonde is laughing, "This won't be funny!" and he sets the car
on fire, and still the blonde is laughing hysterically. He
says "what's so funny, I have done all this to your car!"
"Why are you laughing?"
"While you weren't looking I stepped out of the circle 5 times."


OMG I"M CRYING sorry that shyt is funnnyyyy!!!!!

[JenLuvsStunters]

There is a blonde, a burnette, and a redhead in an elevator. The
redhead looks at a wall and says "that looks like a cum stain"
the burnette smells it and saays "that smells like a cum stain"
the blonde licks and says "yep, it's a cum stain but it's no one
from this building!"


now that shyt is NASTY!!!

[Beatzz]

holy shit rofl!

[JenLuvsStunters]

Why can't blondes count to 70?

Because 69's a mouthful

-------------------------

A pretty blonde woman is driving down a country road in her new
sports car when something goes wrong and it breaks down.
Luckily, she happens to be near a farmhouse. She goes up to the
farmhouse and knocks on the door. When the farmer answers, she
says to him, "It's Sunday night and my car broke down! I don't
know what to do! Can I stay here for the night until tomorrow
when I can get some help?"

"Well," drawls the farmer, "you can stay here, but I don't want
you messin' with my sons Jed and Luke."

She looks through the screen door and sees two men standing
behind the farmer. She judges them to be in the early twenties.

"Okay," she says.

After they have gone to bed for the night the woman begins to
get a little horny just thinking about the two boys in the room
next to her. So she quietly goes into their room and
says, "Boys, how would you like for me to teach you the ways of
the world?"

They say, "Huh?"

She says, "The only thing is, I don't want to get pregnant, so
you have to wear these rubbers." She puts them on the boys, and
the three of them go it all night long.

Forty years later, Jed and Luke are sitting on the front porch,
rocking back and forth.

Jed says, "Luke?"

Luke says, "Yeah, Jed?"

Jed says, "You remember that blond woman that came by here about
forty years ago and showed us the ways of the world?"

"Yeah," says Luke, "I remember."

"Well, do you care if she gets pregnant?" asks Jed.

"Nope," says Luke, "I reckon not."

"Me neither," says Jed, "Let's take these things off."

[Beatzz]

rofl....:D

[BIG-D]

i know i was just givin u shyt too!!!!

HAHA good shit

[MI Xtremes Vig]

dont encourage james on his comic routine, lol

[Laura Ann]

dont encourage james on his comic routine, lol

oh believe me........ we shot it down..... what's up Vig?

[Mi Xtremes Jeff]

Did more then just shot it down... rubbed it in too!!! :D

[Laura Ann]

Did more then just shot it down... rubbed it in too!!! :D

ahhhhhhh hahaha :D that's for sure...... u guys make it home ok? a guy at the northwest counter hooked me up with first class tickets all the way home.

[Mi Xtremes Jeff]

Yes made it home just fine.. but ready for the 3rd hurricane that will be hittin early next week.. which will be worst of all ....
Trac Ho operator? :p

[MI Xtremes Vig]

damn hurricanes dont they have something better to do

[wheeliekid]

hahah some of those are good

[Mi Xtremes Jeff]

damn hurricanes dont they have something better to do
yea, you must miss teh hurricanes, cause your ass is coming back home..... bioottcchhhhhh

[MI Xtremes Vig]

hurricanes= good surf

[Mi Xtremes Jeff]

hurricanes= good surf
yea i had no idea you even went to the ocean